Today a person asked me if I knew you because we happened to work at the same place.
Everything flashed by; times we simply shared, times we laughed, times we spent the entire night on the phone, times we screamed at each other and then laughed hysterically like lunatics, and the times you made me immensely sad. For a fragment of a second there I missed you.
Then my answer surprised me, my answer that I don’t remember thinking about, because I only heard myself saying: One day I thought I did.
It’s been more than a year and sometimes I wonder how time passed by that fast. I clearly remember the day I thought I’d never make it without you. Then I think of today, and God I’m so happy.
I remember the first drop of happiness I experienced without you, it was the next morning after I walked out on everything terrible that our relationship was. I remember that moment very well because after months of living as an extention to someone else’s life I felt ALIVE! I was whole. Broken, but at least I had all the pieces around.
Since that day, I’ve never been more intact!
When with you, I was not true to myself or to anyone around me. I was unhappy, I had to keep how I truly felt to myself, now tasting what’s on the other side, it feels so good to not have to hide anything.
Thank you for showing me there was no way out back then, it only made me so eager to find one.